Sometimes the best album is the sellout album.
Sometimes the pretty girls have nothing to say.
Sometimes there's only beer and tortillas in the fridge.
Sometimes losers get laid.
Sometimes the end does justify the means.
Sometimes pornography and excessive violence are fun to watch.
Sometimes tonight becomes a wonderful day.
Sometimes the jokes aren't funny.
Sometimes a dream is the only thing keeping you alive.
Sometimes the stains don't come out.
Sometimes the man with the blue umbrella is a hallucination.
Sometimes all of the intelligence you have ain't worth squat.
Sometimes the dead rise up and decide to take over.
Sometimes nobody has the right answer.
Sometimes a magazine isn't worth three dollars.
Sometimes women are too much trouble.
Sometimes men aren't worth anything at all.
Sometimes people say dissemination of the information.
Sometimes evil rules the world.
Sometimes the whole damn story is made up.

smoking a cigarette covered with blue gel toothpaste
rubbing Carmex on your eyelids
burning a Styrofoam cup and sniffing the fumes
drinking anything with the word 'acid' on the bottle
smoking a cricket
inhaling the fumes from women's panties
flying in a 747
chugging expired milk
smearing Bengay all over your body
tickling yourself
eating fireflies
reading the Constitution
staring at television or computer screens
singing scat vocals
fearing the reaper
believing in fairies
raising the dead
talking to plants
loving a monkey
casting spells on innocent and helpless children
blowing a kiss
dying your hair
wishing upon a star
fucking a duck
popping a wheelie
beating a dead horse
taking a break
calling it quits

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